Pants Rant 2005

I adore Gargamel. I really do. How can you not adore someone who manages to LOSE THE BOTTOM HALF OF A SUIT???!!???!

A few weeks ago, we embarked on a quest to get G a suit for his brother's wedding (11 days and counting...). Now, it is decidedly impossible to purchase a suit off the rack for someone goon-sized. Seriously difficult, but we found one. So, we bought it, took it to the cape, took it back home, moved, and then yesterday went to get the pants tailored because not everyone with a 50 inch chest has a 42 inch waist (thank god).

We arrive at the tailor and G plops down the suit bag and says, I need to get some pants taken in. The tailor opens the bag and says, There are no pants.

He's right. There are no pants. And hillarity ensues...
hello jones of new york sherry speaking

Hi sherry my name is...
couple weeks ago i came and bought a lovely suit from yall.
it went directly into the trunk of the car.the car went on vacation with us to the cape.
we got back from the cape and the suit went directly into the closet to keep it out of the moving chaos as my girl and i had taken to moving into new place and we need a holiday holiday.

jny: ok

well today i went with aforementioned girlfriend to the tailor to get them fitted.specially cause the helpful sales woman at the time had told us the pants were a size 42 and i thankfully am not.

we got to the tailor and to all of our surprise(tailor included)
there were no pants.
we've checked the car.
i've demolished the closet (where the suit was living)and there are still no pants.

this leads me to beleave that some how i bought a suit with no pants.


Let me repeat... HE BOUGHT A SUIT WITH NO PANTS.

Let me also say that we have 11 days to convince Jones of New York that we need a pair of pants to go with the top half of the suit otherwise we are going to be quite a pair at the wedding. As G would say, price of suit 203. price of boots 115
goin to your brother's wedding as the best man who escaped the 2005 broadway tribute to the village people... priceless.

The mystery of the missing pants:
and at least i can NOW finally say ive been caught pantless.

im just boggled as to where the hell they could be other then we didnt get them.

i remeber the saleschick saying the pants were sized 42..
something bout the seem or pleat in the back so we could get em taken in..but i dont remember the PANTS.
do you remember the PANTS?

who the fuck steals pants.
ive never lost pants ever.
hell ive got pants older then yer siblings.
why the hell would i lose pants?