The Schooligan is not a horrible person.
She is also somewhere between not crazy enough to get admitted to the Loony Bin and too crazy to go to work for a week.
My therapist once told me that there is no defined medical condition called a "Nervous Breakdown", but if there were, than I would have had one this week.
So, in lieu of sending me off to the funny farm she told me to take a week (or more) off of work, rest, and she adjusted my meds. Which means, I am taking a higher dose of the drugs that I was convinced do not work. And then seeing her in a week so that I can be "reevaluated". I also qualify for short term disability under the Americans With Disabilities Act, which means that not only can I not be fired, but I can also collect 66% of my pay while on leave. GOD BLESS AMERICA.
I have my doubts about my medically defined level of crazy, since if I am crazy enough to be sharing this with the ENTIRE INTERNET, than there must be something seriously wrong with me, no? But hey, who am i to argue with trained medical professionals and Human Resources people who are letting me stay home and try to stop crying.
Oh, and did I mention that this week marks the 2nd anniversary of my mother's death? No? Oh, well, yeah. So, I guess, that when people tell me that I have every right to feel bad and to try and take the necessary steps to get better I should believe them.
It sure is hard though... but not as bad a living with a black cloud in my head and rabid demons in my soul.
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1 comment:
Hey Jess,
good lord, girl, you certainly do have a very legitimate reason to feel the way you do. I know that teh anniversary of my dad's death always effects me. I hope that you are hanging in there. I am sending you all kinds of loving, supportive thoughts. If you need to talk, I am here.
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