No, really, this was EXACTLY how I wanted to spend my weekend.

I finally took down the Christmas tree. But not without filling the entire front room with pine needles. PT and I were shoving the tree out the front door, and I heard that sound of needles being stripped from the branches, as I groaned audibly, he said to me, "People have been making that sound after Christmas for CENTURIES." We had planned to throw the tree across the street where there is this... wooded, sort of, place, where everyone on the street tosses their grass clippings and leaves and old Christmas trees and stuff. It's not litter, it's all organic. But this weekend, the county had the convicts out there picking up trash. I didn't want to drag our tree through the chain gang, (especially when there is a no-dumping sign posted) so I said loudly to PT, "Why don't we just leave it in the front yard for now?" He looked at me strangely as I pulled him back into the house.

Oh, wait, I forgot to mention the part where I dropped the CAST IRON christmas tree stand on my foot. My GOOD foot.

And the part where the cat scratched me when I was trying to prevent her from leaving with the Christmas tree.

And how my friend's dad got scratched by her cat and his hand blew up to like 4 times its normal size and he had to go to the hospital for IV antibiotics. (This part didn't happen to me)

Then I decided to run the dishwasher and give my brother a haircut. For some reason, the clippers weren't cutting the hair so much as they were pulling it out strand by strand. As I was trying to figure this part out, I heard a strange noise, like there was something wrong with the dishwasher. I poked my head out the bathroom door, but nothing looked weird, so I ignored it. Suddenly, my kitchen was FULL OF WATER, and lurching to one side like the Titanic. I screamed and shut off the water and then continued yelling while frantically trying to mop the water up with towels. (Except, not with the Egyptian Cotton ones. Not those.)

We got the water cleaned up and I was sent under the sink with a headlamp to investigate. From what I could tell, the hose thing for the sprayer came off and left a hole where water was free to leak out when the sink was draining. I stuck it back on and reinforced it with athletic tape. Yeah, no, that didn't work and I had to clean up water a 2nd time some hours later.



Then I went to bed with a book on Cosmopolitans (next best thing to drinking one) that I had gotten at the Tatnuck Bookseller "40% going out of business because Larry is a tool with no business sense or glimmer of compassion for his fellow man" sale. I totally can't get into all that is wrong with this business (that i used to work for), or how much of a total DOUCHE the owner is for just shutting the doors without telling any of his employees that the store was closing and leaving them to show up for work the next morning and see a sign on the door that says, "Out of business". Let's just say that the closing of Tat-Yuck is definitely one of the local signs of the coming of the apocalypse.