What's this? More ridiculous medical problems?

You betcha. Sort of.

I went to see a chiropractor today re: my fucked up foot. I thought that before I have them cut it open and shave off the offending bone I would see if there was anything else that I could do.

Turns out there really isn't. Well, except for these DIFFERENT ORTHOTICS that the chiropractor recomended that will help my feet stay put when I walk. But apparently my pelvis is out of alignment [wink, wink, fuck you.] and she is going to fix that on Wednesday. Oh, and there is some weird stuff going on with my neck and shoulders (DUH) and she suggested I see a massage therapist. Hahahahaha. Whew. Massage therapists are funny. Well, at least ONE of them is. You know, the one that NEVER GAVE MASSAGES. Yeah, that one. (Who is PREGGERS and due in FEBRUARY, fyi.)

The funny part was when she was asking me about any past back trouble or injuries and I remembered that time I was schooling a pony for my neighbor's kid and she decided she'd had enough and bucked me off. I ended up hitting the ground (on my back) pretty hard and lying there for a few minutes thinking that I would probably die there because I couldn't move and the dumb pony was munching some grass just outside the ring instead of going for help. I did get up, put the pony away and hobbled up to my house where I lay on the couch for about 2 days unable to move. I called out of work that day (I was waiting tables at the time.) and my boss demanded to know why the hell I would go horseback riding before work. As though that were more ridiculous than waiting tables for $2.65 an hour. Jerk. (The place is out of business now. heh heh.)

The chiropractor then asked me how many times I had fallen off horses. I was like, 8, 9, 10? I don't know. Too many times to count. Then she put on my chart "multiple falls from horse". Which, I have to say, is better than "walks like an uncoordinated duck."